


How Burt Hummel Saved Season Three

by JessAlmasy



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-04
Updated: 2015-06-04
Packaged: 2018-04-02 18:34:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4070263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JessAlmasy/pseuds/JessAlmasy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Instead of Kurt keeping quiet about Karofsky, he asks his dad for help... and it changes everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	How Burt Hummel Saved Season Three

**Author's Note:**

> Quick one-shot because Puck got tired of being the friend. The timeline is weird. This story takes place during season three, after sectionals and season two, after NBK. Thanks for reading! =D

[Kurt – Present – Winter Senior Year]

_I really don't know how this keeps happening to me. Am I that outrageously dressed? They couldn't have actually seen me from across the parking lot..._

Kurt is backed up against a brick wall. He was heading for the mall to meet up with Finn when he'd been spotted. He's wearing pants, so it's not the worst thing he's ever worn, but they are, perhaps, a bit tight. And bright blue. But he was wearing a coat! And his scarf should **not** get this kind of reaction.

Kurt is worried. It's not like he'd never dealt with situations like this before, he has. But it's always been at school, usually surrounded by witnesses... not on the side of a parking lot with no one else in sight. _Oh god. What do I do? I can't fight them off, I might be able to handle like... one guy. If he was small. And possibly sick... or stupid... or slow. But not three of them._

Kurt watches the three jocks warily, knowing it's only a matter of time before they get bored with the taunts that Kurt has been valiantly ignoring for the past ten minutes. Eventually, they're going to move on and either walk away, _doubtful_ , or start throwing punches. The guy on the left sees Kurt's panic and steps forward,

"What's wrong, fag? Aren't you gonna spout out some of those legendary one liners? Oh, I know! Why not take a shot? Come on, hit me! My kid sister smacks me all the time, I'm used to it."

Before Kurt can figure out if it's really worth the extra beating to throw a fit, they're interrupted by a new voice.

"Hey guys. What'cha got here?"

Kurt flinches. He looks up from his shoes to see David Karofsky and Azimio Adams walking up to the other three guys.

_Shit._

* * *

[Kurt – Junior Year – Never Been Kissed]

As Kurt sits on the floor of the hallway, his arms wrapped around his knees, he tries to decide what to do. He can't keep doing this. Thanks to his newest locker slam, he's going to have a bruise on top of a bruise. He gets what Karofsky is doing; even he had panicked at the idea of coming out and his closet had a lucite door. But Karofsky freaking out over his sexuality doesn't mean Kurt deserves bruises and taunts. _He better not have snagged my sweater... it's hard finding a shade of yellow that doesn't make me look sallow._

Finally standing, Kurt makes his way outside, glad that it's the end of the day. He'd sat longer than he thought, the parking lot was mostly empty.

When he gets home, Kurt goes straight to his room. After checking his newest bruise in his full length mirror, Kurt curls up on his bed, trying to decide what to do. He can't tell anyone. Karofsky might be a meathead jock but... no one deserves to be outed. He really needs to talk to him... alone. Clearly, bringing Blaine along hadn't been the answer. Then again, he'd never really thought that Blaine would be so open about what they were talking about while on school grounds.

 _Not hard to understand why Karofsky had reacted like a bear stuck in a trap._ So he needed to talk to him... but not at school... _Sure. I'll just stroll up to his truck after glee club and ask for a ride home to discuss his internalized homophobia. That won't end in disfigurement._

When he hears the front door open, Kurt springs up. _Crap. I didn't realize it was that late already._

Running up the stairs, Kurt yells out, "Sorry, Dad! I got distracted and haven't started dinner yet."

Glancing over at Kurt as he sets down his keys, Burt says, "No sweat. We'll just order a pizza or something. It's been awhile." At Kurt's nod of acceptance, Burt walks into the kitchen to look for the number.

After he's placed the order, he sits at the kitchen table and asks, "So, what were you distracted by? A boy?"

Kurt wants to laugh and deny it, but the sound sticks in his throat. Coughing to clear it, Kurt squeaks out. "No... um... actually, can I talk to you about something?"

Burt watches him thoughtfully before answering, "Sure, kid. You know you can tell me anything." When Kurt just nods but doesn't speak for several long minutes, Burt gets up to get a beer. "If this isn't about a boy, what's it about?"

Kurt shifts, "Well, it is about a boy, sort of. Just not a **boy**." Burt just blinks at him, opening his beer and taking a long drink before sitting back down. "Okay... so... there's a guy in my school. He's not a friend of mine, and he's **definitely** not a 'friend'." Kurt actually uses air quotes to get this across, because he really needs Burt to know now that this was not a discussion about **that**.

Burt snorts, "I get it. It's a guy, but not your guy. Moving on?"

"Right... Well, he's a jerk. Like, a total asshole. I don't like him, not even as a friend. This is not a guy from glee, or a secret friend I've never mentioned. He's a jock. So you can't mention this to Finn or anyone." When Burt nods, Kurt relaxes, "I uh... found out that he's not 100% straight. I don't know what percentage is like me, but definitely not straight. And I don't know what to do."

Burt picks at the label on the bottle before asking, "I want to ask obvious questions like who this boy is, how you know he might be like you, stuff like that, but I'm guessing if I could know, you'd have told me." Kurt nods, he can't tell anyone those things. "Okay, so... what's your question?"

"He's really freaking out that I found out... What do I do?" Kurt is panicked, he has to do something. Karofsky will just get worse now that Kurt knows his secret and he can't let it get worse. "I tried to talk to him about it before, but Blaine started giving him 'You're not alone' speeches on the courtyard stairs-"

"Whoa! Blaine is the kid from the Wobblers right? He did **what**?"

Kurt snorts, "It's Warblers, Dad, like birds? And yeah, he was pretty stupid, I shouldn't have taken him with me."

Burt glares at his son, "Actually, you shouldn't have told him at all, Kurt. If you just needed someone to talk to about it, then talk in general terms, like you're doing with me, but don't tell people his name or have them meet up, especially in school. What the hell were you thinking?"

Kurt huffs. _That I didn't want to get my ass kicked because a closet case decided to kiss-rape me in the locker room?_

"Hindsight, Dad. I know that... now. Anyway, my question is what should I do? I think he needs someone to talk to, and to know that even though I know, I won't tell anyone." At Burt's blank stare, Kurt flushes. "Anyone **else**."

Burt sighs and leans back in his chair, "I'm assuming because you needed back up that you don't want to go alone. Are you afraid of this kid?"

Kurt hedges, "It's not that I'm afraid, it's that I'm cautious. It's a hard thing to accept and he may not want to listen to what I have to say. And yeah, he's a big guy. If he did get angry enough I would have no chance of stopping him from hurting me. Better safe than sorry. That's why we thought... ya know, public."

"Well, that was stupid." Burt takes another pull on his beer. "Talking in public about something like that, around here, is crazy, even for out kids. You never know who else is listening or how bigoted they are. Be more careful. As for what to do, it sounds like you need to talk in private, but take more back up. Get Finn and another guy to go with you, have them stay close, but not so close they can listen. Like across the yard or maybe the next room, something like that."

Kurt considers this for a second before shaking his head. "I can't tell Finn what's going on, though. So why would he go with me?" Kurt probably could have just told Finn he was going to talk about the bullying, but that would be kind of idiotic. _Why would I talk about the bullying? Clearly 'talking it out' should be left for after school specials and Sesame Street reruns._

After thinking about it for a second, Burt says, "Do you have any classes together? Just tell Finn you have to talk about a project or something."

Kurt jolts a little. "Yeah. Actually, we have French together. I can just say we have to translate a paragraph or something and ask if they can go with me. Thanks, Dad!"

Kurt bounces up to hug Burt before running back upstairs. Burt just shakes his head. "I need another beer."

* * *

[Dave – Present]

 _Oh god dammit. What is Fancy_ _**doing**_ _?_

When Dave had first seen Kurt outside the mall, he'd assumed he was having a bitch fight with the guys standing in front of him. But as Dave and Az move closer, he can tell that Kurt looks scared. He's trying to hide it, but Dave can tell. _Well_ s _hit. Not much affects him anymore. After all the shit went down last year, I'm pretty sure his surprise quotient was filled and he can no longer be shocked._

But that's exactly how Kurt looks right now, shocked and scared. He's pressing himself lightly against the wall, his eyes darting around like he's looking for escape. As Dave moves closer, he hears the guys, second string Titans, making derogatory comments on everything from Kurt's clothes to his mouth.

Then Bobby steps forward.

"What's wrong, fag? Aren't you gonna spout out some of those legendary one liners? Oh, I know! Why not take a shot? Come on, hit me! My kid sister smacks me all the time, I'm used to it."

Kurt's eyes drop to the ground and his fists clench. Dave steps forward, "Hey guys. What'cha got here?"

When Kurt's head flies up, Dave really wants to laugh at the look on Hummel's face, but he doesn't want to give the idiot underclassmen the wrong impression. Instead, he and Az turn to face Kurt and glare at him.

He watches Kurt glance toward freedom uncertainly, like maybe he just missed a way out of this, and it's right there. Bobby steps back once, turning to them. "Hey man, what's up? We found us a fairy to kick the shit out of."

Dave pulls a face like he's impressed and says, "Really? That's awesome, dude. I didn't think you had it in ya."

Bobby glances at the other two guys with him questioningly, but turns back to Dave when they are just as confused as he is. "What? You didn't think I could kick Hummel's ass? Seriously? I'm pretty sure I know 8th graders that could take him."

Dave just laughs. Azimio finally speaks up, also chuckling. "No, see, that's not why we're surprised. You could probably take Hummel. Definitely with all three of you."

When they still look confused, Dave says, "I'm just a little surprised that you thought you could kick **my** ass. I mean, you're welcome to try. It'll be the most fun I've had all day. Who knows? I might even get to grope you while I'm at it. This could be a real red letter day for me."

Dave sees Kurt sag against the wall, relieved. Dave glances briefly at Azimio and nods toward Kurt. Az laughs and moves over, leaning back on the wall next to him. "Sup, Hummel?"

Kurt huffs, turning to him. "God, Az. What the hell is he doing? Is this really how he wants to do it? Over **this**?"

Dave cuts in, still not taking his eyes off the very confused football players, "Hey! There are worse ways. And at least this way it's for a good cause. And I've been looking for a reason anyway. The important people already know, and it's not like I'm rolling in prospects, so there's no dating issues. I had no real incentive. Saving your ass though? It's a good one to save." Dave winces when he realizes what he said.

Glancing back at Kurt, Dave hopes not to see- _Damn. He's smirking. I'm going to pay for that. Fuck._

* * *

[Dave – Junior Year]

Dave has just managed to clear a level on Halo when he hears his doorbell. As he stomps down the stairs, he wonders who would drop by his house this soon after school. His friends would at least text first and his parents are still at work.

Throwing open the door, he sees possibly the least likely thing he'd ever expected. Okay, maybe if like... a unicorn or a dragon was standing there, it would be more surprising... but only because they rang the doorbell... and not by much. Instead, it's Kurt Hummel. And behind him, standing a little too close, is Noah Puckerman. Behind **him** is Finn Hudson and Sam Evans. Just... what the hell?

While Dave is still processing the image, Kurt bursts out with, "Hey! We need to talk about that **assignment** from French class."

Still confused, Dave starts to ask what the fuck he's talking about when he finally catches on. _Oh. He wants to talk about... shit._

"Uh... sure." Realizing that half the glee club is standing on his front porch, Dave panics, "Damn, get inside before someone sees all you losers."

After they've all moved in and shut the door, he looks to Kurt. _This is all his idea, let him figure out how to work it._

Kurt shifts from foot to foot. "Um, so... I'd like to talk to you about the bullying too, for a second." Hearing a scoff, Kurt and Dave look over at a glaring Puck. Kurt glares back. "Shut up, Noah. He's going to pay for the sweater he ruined. If you don't want to be here, leave."

When Kurt turns his back, Puck sputters, "Dammit, Princess! You know I'm not leaving here without you, and you know it'll do you no good to talk about him ruining your clothes. That's why they do that shit."

Kurt cocks a hip and crosses his arms, "Oh, I'm aware of that, Noah. I also remember why you're so familiar with their motives. As you used to be almost as bad as he is. You grew up, so give him a chance. Shut the hell up and let us talk."

Dave has to admit, at least to himself, that he's impressed when Puck just stops talking and sulks.

When Kurt turns back around, it's to be faced with Dave's smirk and a raised eyebrow. Kurt just shakes his head. "Don't ask. Is there somewhere we can talk where they can see but not hear us?"

Nodding, Dave walks to the back door and gestures for the three gleeks to stand by the back window, before going outside. When he's standing in the middle of his backyard, Kurt beside him, he can see the protectors watching them carefully from his kitchen. "Okay, Fancy, what do you want? And was it really necessary to bring **three** of them? What's wrong, your dad couldn't make it?"

Kurt actually smiles and huffs a little, "Actually, I only asked Finn. He said he should ask Noah along too, and when Sam found out, he wouldn't take no for an answer. This was my dad's idea though." At Dave's confused look, Kurt says, "I told him that someone, no names, was freaking out because I found out they weren't 100% straight and that I didn't know what to do. He said to bring them and make up a school thing so we could talk."

"Wait... what all do they know?" Dave is panicking. _He wouldn't have told them... right?_

Kurt shakes his head. "Don't worry, they don't know anything. I told them it was about French and a ruined sweater. But we should make this quick, they aren't the most patient bunch of guys."

"Right, so what did you want to say? If you're here to spout more 'it gets better' crap-"

"No! No, that was Blaine. Which I'm sorry about, by the way. Um... I just wanted to say, I'm not going to tell anyone about what happened. I told Blaine and it blew up big time, and I have no desire to repeat that performance. He does know everything, but he goes to school two hours away and I've sworn him to secrecy. So, you have nothing to worry about."

Dave still wants to lash out. All he has is Kurt's word, that's not much of a guarantee. More than he had an hour ago though. "Okay... so what is that you want?"

Kurt shrugs, "I would really like to not be slammed into lockers, that really hurts. I have huge bruises, and if my dad sees them, he'll go to the school about it."

Dave flinches. He hadn't actually meant to bruise him. Damn. "Okay, well I can't just stop picking on you, dude. Then we'd both get shit from everyone else."

"Um... maybe just, not so hard? If you do push me, I can just go with it, throw myself in a way that looks bad but doesn't actually hurt. Like professional wrestling."

Dave snorts, "Oh god. You doing wrestling. Thank you for that image."

Kurt laughs, "Well, there **would** be upsides. Think of all the unitards." Seeing Dave looking uncomfortable, Kurt decides to wrap this up before he reverts to an asshole. "Okay, so you'll stop hurting me, I'll keep your secret and we'll both pretend I'm being bullied. Sounds like a plan."

When Kurt reaches back into his school bag, he pulls out a sheet of paper, handing it to Dave. "Uh, is this your number? What the hell, Hummel?"

"Yes, it is. We needed it to look like we were talking about school stuff and then I figured that if you actually needed someone to talk to about **that** stuff, you could just text me or call me. I doubt you have anyone else you can go to, and it's not like I wouldn't understand. Use it, or don't, up to you. Just thought I'd offer." Kurt just smiles, like it's perfectly normal to offer help to his own bully.

Dave just blinks. "This has been the weirdest conversation I've ever had."

Kurt shrugs, "Wish I could say the same, but I dated Brit for a few days. Nothing will ever compare to her weird." Dave just nods.

* * *

The next few days, Dave waits to see if Kurt will actually keep his side of the bargain. It quickly becomes clear he hasn't told anyone. No slushies. The first time he tries to fake-check Kurt, Kurt plays it up a little too much and almost seriously hurts himself. Dave has no trouble walking away laughing that time. He'd even texted him to tell him to take it down a notch.

Dave catches himself watching Hummel at school and almost falls off the lunch table laughing when a girl screams 'tots' so loud it makes Kurt visibly jump.

He sees people asking Kurt about the locker slams and Kurt telling everyone he's okay, but Dave can tell that they don't believe him. _Good, at least we're being believable._

It's not until he gets a text from Kurt telling him that the gleeks were going to confront him that Dave starts to wonder if he should just stop. He could just tell Azimio the truth and maybe they could back off the bullying... he's not ready to come out. That would be social suicide. But just telling his parents and Az... and stop bullying...

Dave shakes himself. That's not happening. Az would shit bricks and his parents would disown him. He'll just have to keep doing it this way until after high school. Maybe he can come out in college.

He tells Kurt not to worry about it, he'll handle it. Act like nothing is changed. Kurt assures him that as long as he doesn't actually hurt him, Dave can say and do whatever he wants.

Dave was actually surprised that they decided to have it out in the locker room. _What is it about this locker room that invites confrontation? I blame porn._

When Chang gets up in his face, Dave doesn't actually mean to push him that hard. It's not until he has Sam on the ground, punching him in the face that he realizes how quickly this all escalated.

He's a little surprised that he doesn't get more than laps for the fight. No one seems to have told Principal Sue anything.

When he's walking past glee club after school, he sees Kurt trying to teach his dad to dance. He stops when Kurt turns to Finn though. _Oh, that's priceless. Look at Hudson's face. He's freaking out! God, it's not_ _ **actually**_ _contagious, you moron._

His laugh draws Kurt's attention, which makes Hudson turn. To cover his panic at being seen watching, Dave makes a limp wrist hand gesture and walks away.

He has no idea that Burt Hummel had seen him. That he'd asked Kurt what the hell that was about. That Kurt had admitted that Dave had been harassing him. That when asked specifically, "Did he attack you?" Kurt had hesitated. Technically, kiss-rape was an 'attack'.

He doesn't find out all of this until that night, when Kurt calls him, frantic to explain. What he does know is that Burt Hummel is scary as fuck. After he'd charged him down in the hallway, Dave had been really freaked out.

Kurt had assured him, over the phone, hiding in the bathroom so he wouldn't be overheard, that none of this was his idea. He'd told his dad the truth about the bullying, and that he was going to tell him the truth about the non-bullying too. Dave said no. He didn't want anyone to know that he wasn't actually picking on him. Even when Kurt reveals that his dad plans to have a meeting with all of them, including Dave's dad, David refuses to cave.

He regrets that in the meeting. Mr. Hummel had told his dad that Dave 'attacked' Kurt. Dave is confused for a minute, trying to think of a time that his shoving had been bad enough to be labeled 'attack'. When he sees Kurt blushing though, his jaw drops. _No. Kurt would never have told..._

When Kurt shakes his head 'no' slightly, Dave gets it. Mr. Hummel doesn't really know what happened at all, he's just assuming. Kurt must sense his distress because eventually, he cuts off his own dad, in the middle of telling Sue it was her job to protect him. Kurt manages to convince everyone involved that he was never seriously hurt and that as long as it stops, he'd be more than willing to just let it all go.

Sue agrees, reluctantly. She tells Dave that he's on probation, but if one more incident with him is reported, he'll be expelled. He doesn't want to go to a new school and start over. He's popular here, dammit. _Looks like I'll have to talk to Az no matter what. I just have to decide what all I'm going to tell him._

As they're leaving the office, Dave sees Finn and Puck waiting outside. He ignores their glares as he talks to his dad, telling him he'll see him at home. Oh ya, and he's grounded. Damn. He turns just in time to see Kurt walk out of the office, Mr. Hummel following. Both gleeks jerk forward to run up to him but Puck gets there first, wrapping an arm around Kurt.

"Hey, what happened? Are you gonna be okay now? I can't keep doing this, Princess." Puck looks like he might be cutting off circulation to Kurt's arms.

Kurt huffs, turning to his dad. "Sorry about all this, Dad. I really am fine. I can handle a neanderthal. Especially one on probation. Go back to work. I'll even make meat tonight, but you have to eat a salad too." After grumbling and a hug, Burt leaves, Dave avoiding eye contact.

Finn spots Dave and glares at him. Dave glares back, before turning to Kurt. "Ugh. Fine. You can tell the gleeks about our deal but not why. I really don't need to be jumped in the locker room by your boyfriend. And if anyone else finds out, I'll kill you, Hummel."

Kurt giggles, ignoring Puck's mumbled 'not his boyfriend'. "Secret's safe with us, David. My dad will never forgive you for this though. Just so ya know."

Dave suppresses a shudder. _I couldn't date Fancy anyway... I really pity the guy that tries to take Burt Hummel's son away._

* * *

[Puck – Present]

It takes longer than it should have for Puck to realize that Kurt is late. Puck is always late for things himself, so he never really notices when other people are, unless it's been like, ridiculously long. And it has. It's been half an hour. This is **Kurt**. He's on time for everything.

"Hey, man. Shouldn't Kurt be here by now? Did you get the time wrong?" Puck turns to Finn, who looks at his watch.

"Yeah, actually he should have gotten here awhile ago, I'd just talked to him. Let's go check outside, maybe he can't find a parking spot for his land yacht." Finn shrugs, heading back out of the mall and into the freezing cold of winter in Ohio.

Seeing the full parking lot, Puck says, "Well shit, let's look in the side lot? Maybe he was afraid of someone dinging 'his baby' with a door or something."

Huddling into their jackets, Puck and Finn walk around the corner of the building. They stop when they see three members of the football team along with Dave standing in front of Azimio and-

"Kurt! What the hell is going on?! We've been waiting forever. Even **Puck** noticed." Finn yells, waving his arms and moving closer to his brother.

Puck follows him, eyes narrowing at the Titans. _I know those guys, they're like... freshman. And total dicks. What the hell is going on?_

"Hey, Princess. Fill me in. You making some new friends?" Puck moves closer, standing in front of Kurt with his back to the idiots.

Kurt scoffs. "Hardly. Those three wastes of space had decided to pick an easy target for their ignorance. I just happened to be the shiniest thing around to draw their attention."

Az grins, "Well, you are pretty shiny, Hummel."

Kurt turns to him, "Sorry, Az. You're not my type. Thanks for noticing though."

"That's not what I hear. Seems like someone has a thing for jocks. Maybe those assholes were just worried you were gonna make your way through the whole team and they were next." Azimio laughs at the glare Kurt gives him.

"You make me sound like a whore, you realize. I've only been with one guy! And yeah, there may have been a jock fetish for awhile, but I'm mostly over it. I can only throw a letterman jacket on my bedroom floor so many times before the thrill wears off." Kurt shrugs, like he doesn't even know what he said.

Puck stares at him. "Oh really, that bored are you?"

Frowning, Kurt thinks back over his last statement, then blushes. "Shit. You know that's not what I meant. I'm just over the jock thing. You can only get nailed to the lockers so many times before it becomes normal." Seeing no change in the blank stare, Kurt huffs. "Getting over a jock fetish is not the same as being bored in the bedroom, or otherwise, with your boyfriend. It just means I'm not eying up other guys. It's a **good** thing, Noah."

The conversation finally seems to break Bobby. "What the fuck?! You have a boyfriend? And you've been fucking him in our locker room?! That's disgusting!"

Kurt shrugs, "To be fair, it was my locker room long before it was yours."

Azimio laughs, "True. He made out with a dude in there well over a year ago."

" **Az!** Shut up! I meant I was on the team my sophomore year. And I didn't make out with him! It was just one kiss." Kurt smacks Azimio's arm. He's too busy laughing uproariously to even notice.

Dave shrugs, still watching the baby Titans, "We could have, you're the one that stopped me the second time, Fancy."

At this point, Finn groans. "Okay, I've heard enough gay talk. You guys have fun with whatever this is turning into, I'm gonna go get a coffee or something, it's too fucking cold for this."

As Finn turns to go back inside, Kurt yells, "I'll be there in a bit, little brother. I just need to get all the meatheads to be reasonable."

Ignoring Finn's yell of, "Don't call me 'little brother'!" Kurt turns back to all the guys standing around him.

Bobby actually speaks before he gets a chance. "So Karofsky is gay? And you've been fucking him in the locker room? What the fuck, man?" He turns back to Dave, who throws his hands up in surrender.

"Nope. No way. I'm not taking the heat for that. I kissed him last year, but I'm not his boyfriend. That guy's just not ready to come out, he's only bi. Hell, I wasn't out either, but I wasn't about to let you morons beat the hell out of Kurt." Dave takes a step back.

Bobby speaks up again, "Oh, so the little fairy's boyfriend must not care about him too much, huh? Shouldn't **he** be the one here protecting you, Princess?"

Before Bobby gets a chance to gloat over the glare Kurt shoots him, he finds himself flat on his back, on the ground, clutching his face. Puck steps back, shaking his hand out.

"It's not my fault that he wouldn't wait for me at his car like I told him to. He's always running around doing stupid shit." Puck goes to glare at Kurt, like this is all his fault, but stops to lean down in Bobby's face. "Oh ya, and only I can call him 'Princess'. You touch so much as one hair on his head and I'm gonna tear you limb from limb. Got it?"

Not waiting for an answer, Puck steps back over to Kurt. Azimio takes that opportunity to move over and join Dave in 'helping' Bobby to his feet and strongly 'suggesting' it's time for the idiots to leave. Not a hard sell since the two underlings have looked like they wanted to run for the past ten minutes.

Puck puts his hand on Kurt's cheek. "You okay, babe? Your face is freezing."

Kurt shrugs, "I'm alright, David got here in time." Deciding to deal with the freak-out he can feel coming on later, Kurt reaches out to pull Puck closer by his jacket. "Are you sure you want to come out this way? We talked about just waiting, it's so close to the end of the year..."

Puck shrugs. He'd never really cared, Kurt just didn't want to be the cause of his 'social downfall'. _Where does he come up with this shit?_

"Hey, this way we'll be able to make out in glee club. It all works out. Seriously, babe. You know I don't care. You're the one with the hang ups." Puck reaches down for Kurt's hand, noticing how cold it is, he says, "Okay, time to get you a coffee, before things start falling off. We need those things, can't afford to lose them."

Kurt leans up to kiss Puck before pulling him toward the door.

He's only made it a few steps for Az calls out, "Hang on a sec. What do we do with that guy?"

Puck and Kurt turn to see a tall boy, about their age with brown hair and green eyes, leaning against a car watching them with a smirk on his face.

Kurt frowns, not recognizing him. Puck takes half a step between him and Kurt.

The guy just raises an eyebrow, "Finally noticed me, huh?"

* * *

[Puck – Junior Year]

When Kurt stands in front of the glee club and tells everyone that he and Karofsky had made an arrangement, Puck clenches his fist. _I've been so fucking worried about Kurt getting hurt, and now I find out that it was all a scam? What the hell._

Most of the girls want a better explanation, but Kurt just tells them that he can't get into it, but that Karofsky was on probation now, so it wouldn't matter. Just let it go.

Puck tries. He really does. He wants to forget that Kurt was picked on, hurt. He tries to move on, pretend it never happened. But he catches himself walking out of his way in the halls to check on him. He watches him closely in the lunchroom and even walks Kurt to French class, because he knows they have it together. It's not until he starts actually following Kurt to the parking lot, ducking behind cars so he doesn't get caught, that he admits to himself that he has a problem.

Deciding to just deal with it and talk to Kurt, Puck offers to help Finn move his stuff to the new house, as an excuse to talk to him. After dropping a box in Finn's room, he pokes his head in the door to Kurt's, which was left open. He sees Kurt watching the movers out the window, talking on his phone.

"No, they're not hot. They're all old and fat. … No! Not like you! You're a little chubby, it's mostly muscle, these guys are like, haven't moved off their couch in 20 years, fat. … No, David. I don't have a 'thing against fat guys', I just don't want to be with someone who does nothing but sit and watch TV."

Puck stops, staring. _Is that Karofsky? Are they really talking about what Kurt wants in a man? Seriously? What the hell?!_

Puck knocks on the door to draw Kurt's attention. When he turns, Kurt smiles, and says into the phone, "Sorry, I gotta go. Puck just came in. … Oh my god! Shut up, David! Jesus. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

After he hangs up the phone, Kurt sits on his unmade bed. "So, what's up?"

Puck shifts his feet for a minute, before saying, "Um... Finn went to the old house to pack up the last few boxes. I think he was getting his porn stash or something, he wouldn't let me go with. Where's Burt and Carole?"

Kurt raises an eyebrow, "Still at work. We're supposed to be doing it ourselves, to prove we can be alone together. Having you here is kind of cheating, but I won't tell if he won't. Honestly, they're all little too concerned. I moved on from that crush ages ago."

Puck can't stop himself from asking, "Oh, really? So what, you have a new one now?"

Kurt blushes, "Um... yes, actually." When Puck just watches him expectantly, Kurt huffs. "It's Blaine's fault. He said he stood next to the hottest guy on our team at sectionals when they named the winner and he hasn't shut up about it. Hard not to be affected when there's that much gushing going on. Especially when it's a guy I'd already noticed was hot."

Clearly hoping that Puck wouldn't push the topic, Kurt gets up and starts unpacking a box. "So, did Finn say how long he would be? I'm actually thinking about ordering a pizza, I'm so freaking hungry."

When Kurt turns back around, Puck is standing right behind him, so close that their chests touch before he stumbles back. "Um... Puck... what are you doing?"

"I was standing next to Hairgel at sectionals. I'm the hottest guy on our team." When Kurt's only response is to gulp, Puck says, "So, it's true? You have a crush on me?"

"N-no. Blaine does. I mean... it's... ugh. God. Shut up, Puck. It doesn't matter. I had crushes on Finn and Sam too, somehow they survived it. It'll pass. Just let it go."

But as he goes to step around Puck, he grabs Kurt's arm and pulls him in close. "What if I don't want to let it go?"

Kurt watches him warily, "Puck, please. It's not a big deal. You're not that guy anymore, don't revert back into an asshole."

When Puck catches on, he starts laughing. _Oh god. He thinks I'm going to kick his ass! He thinks I'm mad about it... he's so fucking clueless._

Stepping up close to Kurt, Puck leans down and whispers in his ear, "What if I don't want to let **you** go?" He leans back a little so he can watch as Kurt works it out.

When he finally does, Kurt sputters, "Wha-what?!"

Puck let's go of him and goes to sit on the edge of Kurt's bed, leaning back on his hands. "I don't guess you've heard the rumors. Which is kind of surprising. I figured if anyone would pounce on shit like that, it'd be you." At Kurt's blank look, Puck laughs. "I'm bi, babe. I don't generally admit it, but after I had a threesome with Matt and April sophomore year, I figured the rumor made it all the way through glee at least."

Kurt stares at him, mouth open for a good 30 seconds. Puck manfully resists a joke about offering. Eventually Kurt snaps out of it and says, "So... you're not mad that I like you?"

Snorting, Puck says, "Hell no. You're hot as fuck, dude. I've been freaking out over this Karofsky shit. Now I'm just confused about you and him. That was him on the phone right?"

Kurt debates for a second before pulling out his phone. As he's typing out a text, he says, "Hang on." A few minutes later, the phone chimes and Kurt smiles down at it before responding and setting it on the table.

Kurt takes a step closer to Puck before saying, "Okay. I'm going to tell you something but you have to swear not to tell anyone. Not Finn, not your mom, not even your rabbi. No one."

Puck nods, "Sure, babe. I managed to keep babygate a secret for months."

Kurt smiles, "Okay... so... Dave kissed me. That's how I got him to back off with the bullying. He was afraid I would tell people."

Puck jolts, "Wait, what? Karofsky's gay?"

"Yeah, apparently. Although he hasn't labeled it yet. He's just now getting comfortable talking about if guys are attractive. You are, by the way. But not his type."

Puck takes a few seconds to breathe before forcing himself to move away from that topic, "But, I'm yours, right?"

Blushing again, Kurt nods. "Yeah, he's having a lot of fun at my expense at the moment. He seems to find it hilarious that I have a jock fetish. He's put out that it doesn't extend to him, but really, he's spent months making my life hell. I can't really switch gears **that** fast."

"So... if you like me, and I think you're hot as hell, and you're not with anyone... why aren't we making out?" Puck gives Kurt a smirk, leaning forward.

Kurt huffs and puts a hand on his cocked out hip. "Look, I might be gay and desperate, but that doesn't mean I'm going to mess around with the first guy that hits on me. I want a boyfriend, not a meaningless hook up." Puck hears him mutter something that sounds like, "I want to matter."

Puck just snorts. When Kurt looks offended, he says, "Babe, I know you. I know you're not going to mess around just to get laid. I wasn't asking you to. It's not really shocking that you don't want to date me, though. I've tried dating before, I just have horrible taste in chicks. Santana dumped me because I'm broke and Quinn wouldn't even date me because I'm a loser."

Puck flopped back on the bed, staring at the ceiling. _Figures. Even when someone likes me, they still won't date me. God forbid I want more than an easy fuck._

He's pulled out of his thoughts by a weight settling over his lap. He jolts, sitting up on his forearms to find Kurt straddling his legs, sitting back on his thighs. When he can't form a sentence, Kurt giggles.

"You're so cute when you're confused." He reaches out, holding on to Puck's shirt, leaning down toward him. "I didn't know you would actually date me. I have no problem giving us a shot. I know you're not out yet, I'm not asking you to be. But people will have to know we're at least friends. I can't pretend to not even know you in public, if we're making out at home."

Puck almost asks if they can fuck at home if he comes out as Kurt's boyfriend, but he's interrupted by Kurt pushing him back to lay flat on the bed and leaning over him. When Kurt leans down to kiss him, Puck's mind blanks out.

As he moves his hands up to see if Kurt will slap him if he touches his ass, Puck grins into the kiss.

_Oh, I can't wait to see Finn's face when he finds out._

* * *

[Sebastian – Present]

Sebastian Smythe was pissed off. He'd spent all week hearing Blaine gush about 'The One That Got Away'. In fact, he'd heard so much about 'him' that he kind of wanted to stuff Blaine's mouth with socks. Ever since he'd moved here and started attending Dalton, he'd been annoyed by Blaine. Everyone fawned all over him, gave him the best solos, and generally treated him like their king.

_Okay, so he's kind of hot, if you're into hair gel and Katy Perry. But come on, there's plenty of other songs and singers just as good as he is._

Seb had been heading to the mall to meet some of the Warblers. After yet another fight over solos, Sebastian hadn't really wanted to go, but he'd been bored. Random hook ups at bars were getting old. He was surrounded by couples everywhere he went. Even Blaine had started flirting with a freshman lately.

To make matters worse, every time someone mentioned a song sung by a woman, one of the older Warblers would lament the loss of their countertenor, Kurt Hummel. He'd been expecting a total babe, the way Blaine went on about him. So when he'd first seen Kurt at sectionals, dressed in a white blazer and singing Michael Jackson, Sebastian had been unimpressed.

_It isn't that he's bad looking. He's not. He's pretty. But seriously? Could he be any more stereotypical? Even in the middle of a routine where he was obviously dancing to choreography, he'd made it clear just how gay he was. There was no closet involved with that guy._

Sebastian had a lot of pet peeves, one of them was the prancing fem types that made everyone in this backward town look at him like he was wearing a dress.

As he steps out of his car and makes his way across the parking lot, he notices a group of guys standing out of the way. Curiosity getting the best of him, he'd moved closer, wanting to see what's going on. Just when he's about to speak up, he notices two more jocks coming from the other direction. Seb steps back behind the car and listens to the new guy ask what he'd been about to.

Before long, he realizes what's going on and glances at the guy the bear is protecting. He almost growls when he sees it's Kurt. _Fuck. Of course it is. What is it with this guy? Does he shove catnip down his pants?_

Eventually he realizes no one is paying any attention to what's going on behind them, so he leans back against the car and decides to just watch the show. Finding out the guy with the mohawk is Kurt's boyfriend should surprise him, but really, at this point? Not so much. It's definitely catnip.

It's not until the big black guy looks over at him that Sebastian starts smirking. When he draws everyone's attention over, Seb says,

"Finally noticed me, huh?"

Kurt looks like he wants to say something but 'Puck' beats him to it. "Do we know you?"

Standing straight and putting his hands in his pocket, Sebastian walks closer. "Nope. We've never met. But I know who Kurt is. I'm a Warbler. Blaine, Jeff and Nick talk about him all the time."

Kurt startles a little before saying, "Oh! That makes sense. Nice to meet you! I'm Kurt, obviously. This is Noah, call him Puck. That's David and Azimio." Kurt points to them all in turn.

Sebastian just smirks, "I know, I got here the same time they did." He nods at the bigger guys. "I was going to ask what was going on but they made a better entrance than I did, so I just hung back. Sebastian Smythe, by the way."

Kurt just nods, smiling, seemingly unperturbed by the tense atmosphere. "Nice to meet you. Although if you're close friends with Blaine, I don't think you'll get along well with Noah or David. They don't like him much."

Puck scoffs. "Of course not. He won't shut up, asking you who your boyfriend is and how serious it is. He gets too handsy when you hug him. He's clingy. He wears too much hair product. He has a bow tie collection. He never let's anyone else in that group sing, don't think I've forgotten the way he treated you. And he turned you down. He's an idiot. And-" Kurt finally cuts Puck off by slapping a hand over his mouth, hissing at him,

"Dammit, Noah! Sebastian might be his friend. What if he tells him?" Puck shrugs and a second later, Kurt yelps, taking his hand away and wiping it on Puck's jeans. "Eww! Noah!" Kurt slaps Puck a few times, only stopping when he hears Azimio laugh.

"Damn, dude. I knew D was a masochist, but I didn't know you were. You just gonna let him beat on you like that?"

Puck smirks, "I'll let Kurt beat on-" he's interrupted by a smack to the back of the head.

"Oh my god! Shut up, Noah!"

"Oww! That hurt, Princess! And he said it! All I did was agree." Puck pouts at Kurt, but seeing it's not working, just sighs, and wraps an arm around his waist, nuzzling his neck and murmuring to him.

Kurt huffs, smacking Puck's arm again. "Yeah, yeah. Shut up." He turns back to Az, "You say one more word today and I'm telling your sister this weekend. We've all had enough of your comments to last us the day."

Azimio's face drops. He growls out, "Fine." and stomps off for the mall. "I'm gonna find Hudson. He's right. It's too fucking cold for this."

Dave laughs. "God, I don't know who he's more afraid of, Kurt or his sister."

Snorting, Kurt says, "Sister. You wouldn't believe the shit she did to him when he was growing up. She told me she took it too far sometimes. Woman is crazy. She has awesome taste in shoes though."

Dave nods, "What are you meeting her for?"

"She's bringing her car in. It's making a clicking sound, apparently." Kurt shrugs, looking back at Sebastian. "Sorry, your thunder was stolen. Although you're probably used to that if you're a Warbler."

Shaking himself, Sebastian nods, "Yeah. And don't worry, Blaine is okay, but I totally agree with Puck... about all of it. Especially the hair gel."

Kurt smiles. "Great! Well, if you're not busy, why not catch a movie with us? It was just going to be us and my brother but it seems like Az and David have crashed, so you'd actually straighten out the numbers."

Sebastian can't resist a smirk, "Not much straight about me, but sure. It beats hearing Blaine gush about you again."

Puck scowls, holding Kurt tighter. "I hate **everything** about what you just said."

Kurt smacks him again, laughing. Sebastian just smirks, "Don't worry, I'm not really in to fem, even one that apparently fixes cars?" At Kurt's nod, Seb just shrugs, turning to leer at Dave. "He, on the other hand, should definitely worry. Are you really gay or were you just trying to prove a point?"

Dave blushes six shades of red and looks at his shoes. Kurt giggles. Puck laughs before saying, "Oh no. He's gay alright. And judging by the bashful routine, totally interested."

Dave sputters before recovering enough to glare at Puck. "Dude! I'm over Kurt! Take him inside before he turns blue and stop trying to hook me up with random guys! I was never a threat! Jesus."

Kurt says, "We know that, David. We just want you to be happy."

Puck starts pulling Kurt inside, "Actually, I just wanted to get him laid. But sure, happy works too."

Once it's just the two of them, Sebastian looks back at Dave, who's still shifting on his feet. "So... you're single?"

Dave blushes again, nodding. "Um... yeah. And apparently, I'm newly out. So if we stay friends, expect a shit storm to hit. My parents and those guys were the only ones that knew. Well, and Bland."

"Oh! Bland! Why didn't I think of that? I'm stealing it. I've just been calling him Dapper Dan." Seeing Dave smile, Seb steps close, leaning in a little, "Shall we? I have the feeling the brother and your friend shouldn't be left alone. And I'm 90% sure that Kurt and Puck went to a bathroom to fuck."

Dave nods, still blushing and heads inside. Seb waits until he's far enough ahead that he can check out his ass before saying, "And I never said anything about wanting to be just 'friends'." Dave turns to him with wide eyes.

 _Oh, this is going to be_ _**fun**_ _. I wonder how far down that blush goes?_


End file.
